Choice

I was busy doing my experiment this morning when our secretary came to my room and informed me that I was wanted by the big boss. Oh oh...I knew it. I sort of expected it. In my head I was trying to find the best answer to why I had not sent him his new request of data analysis which only reached my mail box last night at 10pm.

I knocked on his door and mumbled, 'shitsureishimasu~' which means something like excuse me in a very polite Japanese way. 'Come in', he said in a low voice. I went in and stood there with his back facing me. He was looking at his 30 inch Mac monitor. 'Did you receive my mail last night?' 'Yes, I did'. 'Did you understand my idea?'. 'Yes, I did. But I am doing an experiment now so I will send you the data analysis later this afternoon', as I was trying to defend myself. 'Fine, you can send me any time today, tonight or even tomorrow as long as you understood what I wanted.' I was relieved knowing that he was not angry with me.

'There is another thing that I want to talk with you. I just received an e-mail from Prof. A from Birmingham who actually has a new post in his lab. Would you be interested? Well, to be frank with you he actually requested for you.' I was speechless.

'I know you belong to your government and I know that you have to go back to your job. I know your situation well but as I had told you before, I want you to be a leader in Immunology one day in your country and I think this is a great opportunity for you. It is a good exposure for your career. The duration for that post is 3 years and it starts this December. It may be shorten but we can always discuss with him later if you are interested. So...what do you think? Oh, and do not worry too much about completing your degree, you'll be fine.', he smiled.

'Thank you sir. I am very much interested with the offer, but first, I will have to discuss with certain people regarding my situation.' I said.

'OK, good. Discuss with the people you need to discuss with and tell me your decision when you have decided. Thank you.'

I thanked him again and stepped out of his office with a heavy step.

So, let's analyze the conversation.

1. I was offered a fellowship in UK and the duration is 3 years.
2. I do not have to worry about my degree = I am guaranteed to graduate on time? Wow!
3. I did not look for the job and yet the job came rolling to me? Wow!
(My colleagues had to be interviewed several times for this kind of dream job!)
4. The prof in UK knew that I am attached to Malaysian government and yet he offered me this position? Unbelievable.

Anyone would have jumped at this chance. It's the chance of a lifetime. I have never dreamed of this. All this while, my ultimate goal was to earn a PhD degree, go back to my home country to serve as a government servant and start settling down with my family. Now, with this choice given in front of me, my entire life is about to change.

I broke the news to my hubby. He didn't take it too well too. Well...he's got his lecturer post in UM to consider as well. They want him to come back as soon as possible. No way he can delay it for another 3 years. He'll really have to let go of his position if he's coming with me. We agreed to discuss this later.

We have yet to decide. We are still slowly digesting and collecting information about UK life. I know it is a good place to live and the education system is really good too. I want to go to UK and at the same time keeping my position in the ministry of health. I want to go back and serve the government as a better and experienced professional. I want to...
They are so many things that I want to do and achieve now. I hope I am not being too greedy.

May Allah guide me in this....Amin.